Moving forward

Ah, the diet... the exercise...THE AGONY!

Just kidding. It really isn't all that bad.  I'm only down about 5 more pounds, but that's mostly because I haven't been so active.  I tried Insanity and I liked it, but an old foot injury flared up and since it's so high-impact, I decided to scrap it for now. I'll probably start it again but I'm going to wear my foot brace so that I don't hobble myself. I'm going to the gym again...I know... BORING! It's better than nothing and doesn't leave my apartment smelling like a men's locker room (no offense, gentlemen).
In other news, I just turned 30 a couple of weeks ago! Aside from getting fat again, I really feel great. My prospects are looking up and I just feel like I'm settling into my own skin.

I decided to start watching my carbohydrate intake.  I've completely eliminated grains and have drastically slashed my sugar intake.  I did the Atkins Diet back in 2003 with great success.  I lost 26 lbs. in about 6 weeks - which is a lot of weight. I was only consuming 21g of net carbs per day. To tell you the truth, I don't remember feeling bad, either. That's just A LOT of weight to lose in that amount of time, and boy, did it come back with a vengence when I stopped doing it. I'm taking a better approach this time. I'm aiming to consume under 50g of carbs per day and increasing my activity level. Don't worry, I'm also monitoring my calorie intake, as well. I'm not talking bacon sandwiches with steaks substituting the bread. I'm a green-a-holic. I belong to a CSA and can't get enough of the stuff.  The real bitch of it all is not being able to eat fruit. I had a bunch of bananas and a couple quarts of peaches that I cut and froze to eat on a later date. To tell you the truth, though I haven't really experienced so many sweet cravings. I am going through a bit of Keto Flu at the moment, but I know it'll pass.

Alright, I guess I'll tie things up here since I'm in a fog.

Until next time...

Calorie Counting + Insanity

Today is a new day - at least that's what I keep telling myself.  I decided to start counting calories again.  I'm normally not a breakfast eater, but I forced myself to eat cereal this morning. I keep reading that it's supposed to jump-start my metabolism.  Plus, I figure that I'm going to need all of the protein that I can get since I'm starting Insanity today. I did the Fit Test a few days ago and that alone seemed to whip me.

To be honest, I feel like crap - both in mind and in body.  That "jump-start" that breakfast gave my metabolism made me nauseous, yet ravenously hungry. Seeing as I failed to prepare snacks, I started rooting around the office.  I found a cereal bar to tide me over until lunch. Great - an extra 120 calories, mostly from sugar. Come to think of it, I should have just eaten the egg that I packed with my salad.  I'm just not in a clear state of mind.  I feel kind of depressed.  I'm not feeling sorry for myself, I'm just in a funk - a pissy, cranky funk. I'm sure that I'll be fine once Monday passes. I'm pretty sure that's 90% percent of my problem. ;)  Time to work on my attitude.

Until next time...

Sigh...

So here I am again. Since the last time I posted, I managed to gain back all of the weight I lost last summer. I don't know what it is. I keep falling into these patterns. I keep telling myself, "Starting Monday, I'm getting serious. I'm going back to the gym 4 times a week and I'm going to start counting calories again...blah blah blah." then I never do. It took me unpacking my summer clothes and finding out that they didn't fit. I finally face the music and stepped on the scale. Ouch. I am right back where I was over a year ago and lost everything that I worked so hard for. I went through a period of self-loathing and I still think I am. I started going back to the gym a couple of weeks ago and I was becoming more aware of what I was eating. I'm down 5 lbs- which is great, but it just feels like a drop in the bucket. I'm very self-motivated, which is both a good and a bad thing. When I want it, nothing can stop me. When I don't want it, there is nothing that one can do to convince me. I feel like I'm kind of in between worlds at the moment. Both comfortable and uncomfortable in my own skin, motivated and doing the damn thing, but also depressed about a giant setback. When will I learn? Why can't I become a gym addict instead of a cookie-dough addict? If my followers are still reading this, I'm sorry for the somber post. I know what I have to do and I'm doing it. It's just hard.